Are you STILL disabled?

I got this letter in the mail the other day from the disability insurance company and it is time again to renew my disability.  I don't think that is how they worded it but basically, there are just checking to make sure I'm still unfit for work and not just kicked back, spending there money poolside, living large on their dollar.  OK, so I have some bitterness.  I understand really, some folks get better and that is great!  I got better too, some better, but just not all the way better.  I get a little angry, because if I could work....don't you think I would be doing just that!!!  I loved working!  I loved having purpose and meaning to my life.  It is my daily struggle to know I am a worthy human being without contributing to the economy and to the well being of others.  I wish more than anything that I could get up everyday and go to work, or just stay awake all day.  I wish I could drive all the way to my sister's house to visit her by myself.  I can only drive 30 minutes at a time because I forget that I'm driving after that.  This is a bit hazardous to others and after 4:30pm 30 minutes is a challenge to stay focused.  Sometimes, I can't read because the fatigue makes it too hard to pay attention.  I'm really happy most of the time.  I have family and friends who love me just like I am, a little brain damaged, sleepy like a four year old, and always in need of a ride.  I can still love folks well.  This makes me a worthy human being even though I can't go to work.  I'm not going to take it personally, the disability company and Social Security requiring me to say it again,  "I'm not well.  My brain doesn't Work right.  I can't work."  All my Doctors have to fill out the forms, so what am I whining about.  I guess it has taken me a long time to accept this is the way it is, that I have to practice acceptance all over again when these forms come in the mail.  Practice Acceptance.  OK, I get it.  http://www.yogajournal.com/wisdom/2018